Taking Notes: on following Jesus

There are sometimes a thought crosses your mind, someone appears in your dreams in a random way, you remember something maybe that just causes you to reach out to someone. I'm learning these prompting are God's instructions to me about how to do the things He wants me to do. It could be as simple as a text, a smile, a meal, or even just doing a simple favor for someone in need. Sometimes He will even prompt me to help someone with a need before they even realize they have a need. That's awesome to me and when a situation works out like that I know for sure that it was orchestrated by God. I know that serving others brings more joy than your own personal ambitions. I hope I'm modeling this well for my children and I pray I continue to be used in whatever way God has planned.

" all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be"
                                                      Psalms 139:16

~Tara

Hamster Wheel

Does your life ever feel like a crazy, constant run on an incredibly annoying hamster wheel? That's the current state of my life right now. I am trying to get some perspective though so I will write this post from a positive outlook and look forward to some of the things coming up for us.
Football starts next week... there's just something about having a football game on that makes our house feel so much more like home.
We are taking one last beach trip this year and I cannot wait to sit in my blue chair with my feet in the sand. I'm hoping for beautiful weather and the longest two days of the year!
I'm ready to cook a big pot of soup and have my kitchen window open at the same time so a nice cool fall breeze can blow by me.
I'm ready to walk outside on brown crunchy leaves.
And settle down a little... off my hamster wheel.

~Tara

Long Time Gone

The blog post title sums it up... it's been a long time since I logged on to post on the blog. I almost forgot how. Summer 2015 you sure did bring it in full force!! I'll remember you always. My new job is going well and I think I'm learning the ropes. Adjusting to a full time work schedule has been a challenge but we've managed. Thanks to my kids who pulled a lot of my weight at home this summer. And thanks to my sweet husband who often had to step in and do a lot of my chores that he usually doesn't have to do. We had less than stellar meals and lots of leftovers. They were all patient with me and it's made the change easier.
Speaking of change... you never know when it's coming, what it's bringing, or how hard it will be to deal with. We've been taught this summer all about change personally and in our family. And we've learned to band together and march on.....

~the long way...
Tara

Maddie's Graduation

Just for memories sake, here's a few pics from Maddie's 5th grade graduation ceremony.

our graduate

I did get a little teary eyed when they marched in to the auditorium. I'm sure that's because the traditional graduation processional song was playing and what mama wouldn't cry at that.
Maddie was awarded for her all A's all year, Presidential Academic Excellence and her diploma for elementary school.
Middle school get ready cause here she comes!!

~Tara

Girl Problems

We've known for a while now that we should be expecting Sadie to come in heat. Well on the evening of my first day at my new job, Mother Nature decided it was the appropriate time to drop that little bomb on her mama. What else can I possibly add to my already full plate?

After quickly realizing she was not going to be a pleasant family member while locked in her crate all day, we decided to get her some diapers. I managed to wrestle her down enough to get one on her and this was her reaction. I'm not sure which one of us was most mortified by the act of getting a diaper on her. Poor baby.. she wouldn't even make eye contact she was so humiliated I think.
I'm hoping this doesn't last too long..

~Tara

New Job

I started a new FULL time job this week. I've not worked full time since I became a mother almost 16 years ago. It's quite an adjustment and considering the kids are at the beach this week and my only baby at home is Sadie...I'm sure next week will really put the smack down on me.
I realized on my first day that I will need to have a massively detailed game plan for how I will accomplish dinners, my daily walk/run, and my other house related chores that absolutely must be done. The kids will be taking on some added responsibility and I foresee myself getting up early to run before work. I've come so far working hard to be more fit and healthy that I cannot lose track of my routine. When I get a free minute, I'm getting to work on that plan....

~Tara

Kentucky:Day 2

It's a wonder I can remember back this far.. it's been a month since our trip to Louisville. On day 2, we toured Maker's Mark Distillery. It was pouring rain and the tour was not as good as Woodford Reserve, but the tasting and the gift shop were much better.

The top pic is looking into the distillery room and the bottom two are of blown glass pieces that were suspended from the ceiling of the Masters Distillers Room, which housed the barrels of the bourbon,

Once we made it to the gift shop, Bryan was able to hand dip his own bottle of Maker's Mark 46 in the trademark red wax that coats the top of the bottle.

Fun weekend for sure... and we plan to go back to see a few of the other distilleries.

~Tara

Kentucky: Day 1

Two weekends ago Bryan and I took a weekend trip to Kentucky. We stayed right outside of Louisville but we toured two bourbon distilleries on our trip. On our way up Friday we stopped at Woodford Reserve. The drive into the distillery from the interstate was the epitome of Kentucky beauty. Wooded fence line, huge pastures, thoroughbred horses, and barns. Kentucky has barns and ponds everywhere. It's very beautiful and had me wanting to dig a pond ASAP when we got home.

These are pics of the distillery and barrel warehouse. They still hand roll the bourbon filled barrels down what looks like a small railroad track to the warehouse.

The top pic is the huge vat where they are cooking the mash, next is the mash, then the copper stills and the Woodford Reserve logo. Woodford Reserve is the only distillery that runs their bourbon through three stills, if I remember correctly, all the others are double stilled.

This old warehouse held about $40 million worth of bourbon. I especially loved the chippy paint on the shutters of these barred up windows.

The barrels are stamped with the date they were filled. and they are racked up in this warehouse where they age for between 6-9 years.

 And last but not least, our selfie after the tour was done It was very interesting to learn about how bourbon is made and that it is only made in Kentucky. We toured one other distillery and I'll recap that on the next post.

~Tara

Taking Notes: on why I hope my kids won't miss me

Mother's Day... it can be a strange mixed up emotional day.
Last week I went to Maddie's class for Mother's Day Tea. The kids recited poetry for us and served us fruit and muffins. She gave me her handmade collection of her poetry. I sat in her desk and watched her do her thing with her friends and in the classroom. This is one of her last events in elementary school, which means it's one of mine too. No more class parties to go to or send snacks to, we're looking ahead to middle school and none of those things really go on there. That realization made me a little teary eyed.
And so yesterday, my getting-older children didn't make me homemade Mother's Day cards. They didn't make me breakfast in bed with their Dad's help, they did get up late for church and start bickering, like usual, to which I reminded them it was Mother's Day and I'd just like a happy day, and I might have added a whiny please. So that was that and we were on about our day.
I hoped to take the kids and Sadie to the river since that is one of my most favorite places to be. We packed up and made it there about 10 minutes before the big black storm clouds rumbled down the river. The thunder started and the kids voluntarily asked to head out before the storm caught us. So we did. I rode home with a smelly wet dog in my lap.
 We passed by the cemetery where Nana is buried, where Maddie and I planted petunias in her flower pot the day before. The missing her doesn't lessen as the time goes on, especially for her boys. I often think of something one of the kids did and think about telling her about it but she's not there to tell. But then I remember all the things I did tell her and all the time she spent with the kids and I smile.
I'm different than most I guess, remembering doesn't make me sad, it makes me grateful for what was.
That's when I realized... I don't want my kids to miss me when I'm gone, I'm going to heaven and I won't be looking back. I want them to think of me and remember every good and happy thing we ever experienced or shared together. I want them to remember how I showed them I loved them, even if it hurt or they didn't understand it. I want them to remember that I tried my best to be the mother they needed. I want them to tell my grandchildren stories about me, teach them how to cook all our favorite foods, take them to Edisto and to the river and tell them how much I loved taking them there. I want them to carry on our traditions. I want them to smile and not shed one sad tear over me. I want them to be happy for all the thousands of days I lived and not think another thought about the day I died.
So my note to myself is this: Make your life count for something, even if it's success is in the series of small moments when you just held on for dear life and in the end a beautiful family was your masterpiece. Leave a trail of happy memories for your kids to take walks up and down, over and over. Talk to your kids about the legacy you want them to see that you left behind. Prepare them for  when you won't be there any more, but remind them too that where you will be is in the happy memories. Live so they see you everywhere.

~Tara

On the Water

Last weekend we took the boat out for the first fishing trip this year. We checked the calendar and made this plan a few weeks back so that we could hopefully be on the lake at the right time for the bream to go on bed. This usually happens around the first full moon in May. We did have good luck and caught more that enough for dinner. Bryan caught a bream that was probably the biggest one he's ever caught there.

We had a good time, caught fish, had a picnic in the boat, and just enjoyed being together. That's the best really. This little boat has served us well for about 10 years. It's not flashy, it leaks a little, it's too small for all four of us now, and the motor gives Bryan fits every time we set out in it... it's still our boat and I like to be in it and think back to all the fun times and not so fun times we've spent as a family out on the water.

~Tara

Bowties and Sausage

I made this recipe for our Alpha shift Sunday dinner yesterday. Every Sunday that Bryan works we have lunch after church in dispatch. I look forward to it and to seeing everyone because a lot of times regular people don't really understand what law enforcement life is all about. It's hard and it's stressful and it helps to spend time just enjoying a nice meal and catching up with everyone. I was asked for the recipe and while typing it up I decided I'd share it on the blog.

Bowties with Sausage

1 box bowtie pasta

2 T olive oil

1 pound sweet or hot Italian sausage, casings removed and crumbled

 

½ tsp. crushed red pepper flakes

 

3 cloves of garlic, minced

½ cup diced onion

28 ounces stewed tomatoes, drained (and I usually smash them up with my hands)

1 ½ cups heavy cream

Salt and pepper to taste

 grated parmesan

In a large skillet over medium heat, brown sausage and red pepper flakes in the olive oil. Stir in onions and garlic and cook until onions soften. Add tomatoes, cream, and salt. Simmer about 10-15 minutes until sauce thickens a little. While sauce simmers, cook pasta, then drain and add to the sauce. Serve with grated parmesan. If I have basil from the garden, I'll garnish with it and it really sends this dish over the top, in my opinion... but I love basil.

 

This is one of Bryan's favorite meals and since food is my love language, I really enjoy making it for him. And it's so easy so you can't beat that.

 

~Tara

Things Maddie Says...

Maddie can say some crazy stuff, some funny, sweet and profound. I thought I'd document some of her most recent sayings....

• While getting ready for bed one night last week she said," Mom, you know if Mom's got paid for all the work they did at home, we could be millionaires!!" So true.

• While trying to procrastinate doing her laundry she said, "But Mom, what if the laundry monster gets me while I'm doing my laundry?" To which I replied, "I've been battling the laundry monster for years, and I always win, so you can too." She didn't like that response or having to put her laundry away.

• She plans to adopt 4 babies, two boys from Africa and two girls from China, because she says, "There are lots of babies in the world without parents, so why have more?" 

• After hearing on the news that Hillary Clinton had announced her candidacy for President she said, "No, No, this cannot happen... I'm going to be the first woman to be President." She's got some big goals. 

Maddie is witty, funny, sometimes rather opinionated, and full of awesome personality. She's also an old soul and she can say some things that are wise beyond her years. She's about to graduate 5th grade and she's a beautiful girl. We love her, lots!!

~Tara

Just Stuff

Sometimes life's full of "just stuff". It's when there's plenty to keep you busy but nothing exciting and extremely memorable or blog worthy. This also happens when as your kids get older they begin to value their privacy more and don't find it amusing to see themselves appear on Mom's blog. Either way, here's some of our "just stuff" that's been going on lately...

Maddie had her last volleyball practice last night. She has really enjoyed playing and her skills have improved very much. She's usually always practicing sometime during each day, mainly by serving into her bedroom wall. :(

Maddie has been asking for a loft bed for about a year now and this weekend we have plans to build it, finally. I hope she likes it as much as she thinks she will. I'll be sure to write a post on how it goes.

Over the weekend, Maddie wanted to cook our dinner. She pattied and grilled our burgers, prepped our plates, and made chocolate chip cookies by herself. It was all wonderful. It makes me happy to have her in the kitchen.

Bryan has been on a couple of trips over the last month. Both of these pics are from Pittsburg. He also went to Chicago, both trips were training for work. He sent me pics of all his food because he knows I'm a foodie and would appreciate it. He had deep dish pizza in Chicago that he said was delicious. I'm just glad the travelling is over for a while. I sure do miss him when he's gone. I become very thankful for Face Time during these weeks, what did we ever do without technology.

 

I've been out walking/running more since spring has arrived. Last week on my way up to the track I noticed these flowers blooming out front of the store. They reminded me of happy times there. This was also the place where Grandpa planted his cherry tomatoes and my brother and I would pick the tomatoes and squeeze them until they would "puke" on the ground. It's funny the things you remember.

I also took this flower picture during a walk. Yes, I just posted a poop picture on my blog. But this reminded me that sometimes you have to endure the bad to get to the good. I can see God teaching me this in a lot of different situations in my life. Sometimes one thought will lead to the next that will cause me to realize some truth he's showing me. That's how this picture came about. When it's crappy, keep on looking for the flower.

~Tara

Taking Notes: on Patience

I woke up early this morning and started to get ready for work when I saw a flash of bright light coming through the bathroom window. By the time I was dressed and ready to start my morning by taking Sadie out to potty, I realized that flash was lightening and it was pouring rain.... not really my favorite way to start a Monday morning. See, Sadie is a water loving fool, and she takes great pleasure in standing out in the pouring rain. I do not. I attempted to take her potty from the front porch so I could stay in the dry, but, no, she refused to go. So to the back we went where I huddled under the umbrella while she tried to keep her wits about her while the lightening popped around us, literally. She finally did her business and we hurried back inside, but not before she shook all over me and the dining room and wouldn't sit long enough for me to get her dried off good. Then I had to chase her to dry her, wipe up all the wet paw prints and clean up the puddle from the umbrella, and I hadn't even had my coffee yet. It was at that point that I realized she's been sent to me from God to continue my lessons in patience. You see, having two kids just wasn't enough to teach me adequately all I need to know on the topic of patience. So I'm pretty sure that's why we got her. I must be the most hard headed student ever, because my patience lessons are difficult, and it seems like I have to repeat them a lot. It wasn't too long before Sadie needed to go out again, she always pees first and poops second, never in the same trip... patience lesson #2 of the day...

~Tara

Stepping Back in Time

I've written before about my grandparents store, Cuzzins, and how influential it is in my childhood memories. Everything I remember about the place is comforting, so special and so meaningful to me. We had a chance to go back this past weekend because my uncle was having his 50th birthday party there. It's been at least 7 years since I set foot inside the store. Nothing is the way it was... but strangely, the feeling I have there is. There is one Coke cooler still sitting in the back corner. My brother and I kept it stocked with small and large glass bottle cokes, and other drinks too, but the cokes were all that mattered really. My grandpa drank small cokes all the time and ate Reese's peanut butter cups daily, maybe multiple times, which would be why he had no teeth! Not much that was original to the way my grandparents had the store furnished is still there. The wood stove remains of course and the thing was pumping out the heat Saturday night. It was always so warm standing in front of it. And we would stand as long as we could handle it and Grandpa would pull the front of our pants close to our legs on the back and make us jump from the heat! We'd also try to run past him when he sat in his recliner and try to not get swatted by his fly swatter, it was all fun and games. I walked around and went in the back where my grandparents lived. I stood in the kitchen and breathed in that musty old smell but only the best memories came flooding back.  Running out to play in the back yard while Grandma cooked, Grandpa riding us on the four wheeler through the woods, running down the dark hallway between Grandma and Grandpa's rooms, it was always so scary and seemed like it was so long. In reality, it's about 10 feet. Grandpa had a tradition of having bluegrass music on Saturday nights. Players would come from all around and pick, people would sit and listen, talk to each other and just have fun. In the winter when it was too cold to play outside by the gas pumps, the jam session would come inside to the "picking" room. The back door is signed by all the musicians who have come and gone through all the years of this tradition. During the party this weekend, there were three separate groups of musicians playing, two inside and one outside, and I stood there listening and caught myself looking around as if I could find Grandpa in one of those circles picking his banjo and leading the song. Or maybe I could see Grandma in her rocking chair by the heater. And as I type this post today, I have tears streaming down my face, because I could see them...in my memory, as vibrantly as if it were real life. I thank God for memories, for the time I got to spend with my grandparents, for this store, for the people who came in it and who left with a sweet memory just like mine.
I didn't take any pictures while I was there, and I did so on purpose. I want to remember the store the way it was, perfect, unaffected by time and circumstance, so whenever I want I can step back in time.

~Tara

Life with a Dog

The weather has warmed up recently, thank goodness. We are able to get outside and breathe fresh air and actually do things. Sadie and I started back to our regular daily walk routine. She's doing great on the leash and actually walked beside me properly without much correction and without pulling my arm off, which is what she is accustomed to doing. It's extremely annoying to try to pull her back and walk at a productive speed, but learning to heel and be obedient is part of her training, so I'll do it. Sunday we took a hike to King Creek Falls. She absolutely goes nuts when she gets close to water, or when she can hear it actually. She barks and runs through the water and swims down the current and is just in heaven. I'm becoming concerned about how we will manage her when we go to the beach in July. She's likely to lose her mind with excitement at the vast amount of water.

Speaking of Sadie, I noticed a small red spot on the inside of her leg yesterday. So she's made a trip to the vet this morning. And she has some type of fungus and we have gotten an antibiotic and a spray to treat it. The vet also informed Bryan that Sadie will be coming into heat soon!!! I have no words for this news. My brain kinda freaks out just thinking about it. I thought we had a while before this part happened, I'm so uninformed and unprepared. Bryan has a few classes coming up that will take him out of town for two weeks, so mark it down, the "heat" will most certainly start then and I'm going to have to tackle that problem on my own.

Oh my, I never knew how much I'd love this little brown dog, she is my third baby. I hope she feels better quickly and I hope I can manage all these upcoming issues. For sure, there's never a dull day when there's life with a dog....

~Tara

Surprise Pics

It's been three months since my trip to Colorado. While I was gone, the kids decided to have an impromptu photo shoot, apparently when their Dad wasn't home. Last week, I was transferring some other photos to my laptop and discovered these sweet babies...

I don't think I could've done any better myself.

~Tara

Tamara's Wedding

My sister Tamara got married on Valentine's Day. I was busy doing other stuff so Blake was the photographer for the day and here's a few of the pics he took.

This is the veil I wore in my wedding. My sister in law wore it when she married my brother and Tamara wore it also. I have hopes that all my sisters will wear it as their "something borrowed" and it will be a tradition that Maddie will carry on too.

I stitched this blue heart onto the hem of the dress to be Tamara's "something blue".

Here are the newlyweds during their reception.

And a quick one of the bride and me. It was a nice day considering a lot of the planning and prep was done last minute.
Tamara and Ethan are off to Oklahoma City to begin married life together and we wish them all the best.

~Tara

The Making of a Fan

My nephew Cooper is, by virtue of birth, a Gamecock fan. His mom is a USC grad and has made him that way. :) But last summer we were visiting and Blake had on his Clemson shirt. It wasn't too long until we got word that Cooper wanted a Tiger shirt like Blake had. I happened to find a tshirt and hoodie that were his size so I bought them. We surprised him and Colsen with these shirts and their response was priceless! There were screams and Wow's all around. Their mom wasn't so happy about this situation but I couldn't help but smile. Cooper says he will play football at Clemson if Blake will come watch him. I'm secretly hoping this does come true...I'd love to see him take the field as a Clemson Tiger...but until then we have this sweet memory.

~Tara

Backstage

Bryan and I recently went with our brother and sister in law to see The Marshall Tucker Band in Charlotte. Bryan's brother is friends with Doug Gray who's the lead singer. We went backstage and met him before the concert. It was a fun thing to get to be backstage. Here's a few pics...

Doug was super nice and took time for a photo.

Hopefully we'll get the chance to go again. It was a fun night and we were spontaneous (cause we never are) and stayed the night at the Hilton without any plans to do so. No clothes, no personal items, etc. The kids were all taken care of by grandparents and responsible cousins. And we all survived.

~Tara

Driving

Almost 2 weeks ago, Blake decided to try for his driver's permit. He studied a little and then we went on a Wednesday early release day.
He passed!! I wished I'd snapped a picture of his smiling face as he came out of the testing room because he was so proud, but Maddie and I were happy and cheering for him and looking ridiculous in the DMV. People in there laughed...

Here's Blake at the license counter and Maddie watching him sign his name.

He's done pretty good driving, I've only been scared once and we're all still here to tell about it. 

The first day he drove to school I looked over and couldn't help but imagine seeing him in the driver's seat in his booster seat!! I knew the day would come that he would drive but I didn't know it would come so fast.

~Tara

Volleyball

Maddie has been playing volleyball and had her first tournament over the weekend. Her team won 4 out of the 6 games they played. It was her first time ever actually playing for real,  not practice. It was a lot of fun for her and her friends.

I hope she continues to enjoy playing because she's been on the search for an activity that she loves.

~Tara

Taking Notes: Remember to Pray

Tuesday evening Sadie ate yet another sock. I was watching my niece and nephew for a bit and she was in her kennel. My niece took off her socks because she was sliding around on the hardwood floor and didn't want to fall. Long story short, the kids went in Maddie's room to play so I let Sadie out also. No sooner than I opened the kennel and walked away, she made a mad dash for the socks, that I had forgotten about obviously. So of course, down went the sock, like a vacuum. So that's when the wait and watch began. We thought she'd probably be able to pass this sock because it was so small. So we waited and waited and inspected poop and waited some more, for three days actually. Last night I suspected it was soon to be over because Sadie was not her usual energetic self. I heard her make a few suspicious noises in the night and became more worried about her so I prayed ... quite simply that she would pass the sock. This was the first time I prayed about the sock that went down, but I thought about it and worried about it, lots. I felt very silly praying about a sock in my dog's intestinal tract. I fell back to sleep quickly and slept till the alarm went off, jumped up and started to get ready for work. All the while Sadie is whining and I'm telling her to be patient and I'd let her out ASAP. That's when I finished up and went to her and found that she had puked the sock!! Thank goodness and praise the Lord!! In that moment I felt so grateful that the ordeal was over and God answered my prayer and so ashamed that I had not prayed sooner. Sometimes we feel that God's too busy, doesn't care about silly details, or that it's just ridiculous to pray for certain things. I was reminded this morning while cleaning puke that He does care and that while He does know the concerns of my heart... He's probably waiting for me to speak up and share them with Him. That's what relationship is all about. So for future reference... remember to pray right away about all things, anything, silly things, big deals... and about socks in stomachs.


~Tara

Long Time Gone

I haven't blogged in one month. That shows how busy the month of December is. After my trip to Colorado, things just sort of spiraled into a whirlwind of business so I'm going to do a quick run down of happenings just for the sake of doing it.

We had Maddie's birthday party a few weeks early. She had 13 girls spend the night at Gigi's house. We ate lots and there was lots of makeup, singing and choreography, laughter and good times. I think she enjoyed it especially since it's the first sleepover she ever hosted. She also had her tonsils removed on Dec. 23. She was an excellent patient and recovered quickly without much drama. She also started volleyball last month with a few friends and she's really been loving going and playing. They're just learning the basics but it's still exciting to her.

Blake has started practice for JV soccer. He hasn't conditioned or touched the ball in several years, but I'm hoping the skills come back quickly like they say with a bike, you never forget how to ride.
He has spent a lot of Christmas break squirrel hunting.

Christmas was kept really low key due to Maddie recovering from surgery. We had several meals with family and one with the shift. Bryan got me the best gift, it's a framed sketch of my grandparents old store, Cuzzins, It made me cry, of course, just like Maddie warned me it would. I got Bryan a pair of waders for duck hunting.

Sadie has been up to her usual tricks. We've discovered she's a sock eater.. and she also ate the memory foam from inside her bed when we left her alone too long on New Years Eve.

Bryan and I celebrated our 17th anniversary yesterday. We have a date weekend planned next week when Bryan is off, but we did celebrate yesterday by taking the kids to Night at the Museum 3 and to dinner.

So now there, I'm caught up and will do a photo dump ASAP.


~Tara